I have been good today because I was the one who told him to sleep early and didn't grumble despite hanging up after 3 mins.

I'm sure he must be dead tired after talking for quite a long time with me on the phone last night...and I was amazed that he even told me to call him back after he's done with his toilet biz. It was already 1+ then, and he has a course to attend the next morning. But I didn't call back because I dozed off while waiting, and it shocked me when I realised it was already 2.30am when I got up.

He has been nicer these few days despite me still waiting. He's been leaving me messages on my msn even when I'm offline and I am pleased to know that he's trying to alleviate my fears and insecurity.

I guessed I started feeling better after I left him a pretty long message online to let him know how I feel about things and apologised about being such a nuisance. I am starting to lower my expectations too.

The conversation I had with him yesterday got me thinking for a while. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm really naive and just refusing to admit it. Part of me feels that it's only sooner or later this is gonna end, but the other part of me is refusing to accept. Anyway, his "I won't give our relationship up" made me feel better.

It seems like I don't have any way out but to stick by him, and pray really hard that something good will come out of this.

Hope the situation will turn out for the better for us.