I was filled with thoughts the whole of yesterday with things I cannot understand and/or don't know.

1. Boyfriend

Why is it I have to keep it to such a low profile? I'm NOT shy about being attached, and definitely not shy to let others know that my bf is from China. So what if he's from China? At least I think he beats loads of Singaporean guys out there. He isn't perfect, but he stays precious to me, and I do not see any reason to why I should keep his existence unknown to my relatives. If he knows about this, he will be hurt, and when I was told to keep mum about my being attached, I felt hurt too. My cousins are able to make known about who their other half is, be it whether they break up in future or not, but I can't. I have to always say "my friend", not even mention his name. WHY?!??!?!

2. My boring life

I haven't lived my fill as a 23 year old. In fact, I never did live my fullest. Being still young, I should be dressing up like other girls, talking about the latest fashion, be a fashion slave for the fun of it, do things which I like, that will make me happy. But I never seem to be able to break out from that circle I'm enclosed in. Shopping with my cousin was shocking...it made me realise what a scrooge I am. She buys so many things at one go when we go shopping, while it took me ages to even decide to buy a pair of pants. I couldn't understand how girls her age (21!) can splurge this way. No doubt that she works part time to earn those money to spend, but if I do have those money, I would save them up because there is so much more I can do with that money. I want to put it to good use. I guess perhaps my goals are different from them. CG thinks it's good that we save up for better things, rather than splurging it on cupboards of clothes and what have you, and I'm really proud of him because he's been trying hard to save up for our future together too. He's no longer the boy I first knew who thinks nothing much about money. :) Anyway, about the spending, I mean..I really do wish I can splurge like the others, but the "You must save for a better future, Mich" just stops me completely. Yes, my life will stay boring this way, but I'm seriously hoping that I will feel that it all pays off when I finally get to buy what I want in the years to come, and I'll be able to spend on items I like without thinking toooo much when I start earning my pay.

3. Sitting in a posh car

I guess it's just every girl's dream to be able to sit in a posh car and I'm no different. I watched a woman being dressed nicely and bring driven off in a Porsche last night, and I was wondering if I'll ever be able to own a posh car with my own ability, or be able to have my own bf/hubby drive me around in it.

Then again, on 2nd thoughts, I shouldn't complain and be satisfied. My bf's Audi is good enough, and there are loads of people in China who would die to be in shoes already. No kidding!

4. Spinster

It looks like there is at least one in every generation. Mum says it could be so generation after generation. And it scares me because could it be me this time? I hope not....

5. Childhood video

Dad has transferred all my childhood videos into CDs. I look really happy and active when I was young. Where has those laughters gone to? Where's the old me?


*Have uploaded all my pics in China, but not posted them up yet. Will blog abt it if I have time. The following weeks are gonna be too busy, and I still haven't read anything for my placement...wtf...!*