Needing to keep sane

Decided to hide in my room for a while to make sure I stay sane for the rest of the day. Seriously, I'm starting to get fed up. Not because I hate my job, but I cannot stand the fact that individual respect is such an issue here.

To think I thought only medical students are ignored, and yelled at by grumpy staff. I thought I've gone through that phase, only to realise that there are still grumpy individuals who gives NO respect to whoever u are, unless u're a Consultant.

I must admit that generally the staff here are friendly (beats Cardiff's of course), but still, I find being shouted at by nurses when I'm THE doctor is way beyond my threshold. Note that I'm THE DOCTOR, not the Maria in the house to be ordered around to do bloody venflons at their beck and call. If they're so insistent that the venflon has to be done N.O.W when I've got more important things to handle first, then go do it themselves!

Bad start to the morning, when the phlebs came looking for me to ask me why my patients are having the same type of blood tests done. Ridiculous question I think. First, they were having concerns about why ESR (an inflammatory marker) has be done on patients, and I had to explain that my Consultant likes at least 1 ESR to be done on every patient, and if patients are having some infection of some sort, then clearly it does make sense to monitor ESRs. Then they go telling me that ESR is a non-specific inflammatory marker, which got on my nerves, BECAUSE if it's so darn non-specific to the extent that it doesn't have to be done and monitored, then why the fuck do u have ESRs existing in the hospital? Might as well abolish it!

Back to why patients have the same blood tests done. How many types of blood tests can there be? How very different can the requests be for blood tests? Doesn't it make sense that patients get routine blood checks as inpatients to make sure that there's no new changes? And what does routine mean? FBC, U&E, LFT, CRP! Do you think I like bleeding my patients so often? You think I'm so fucking free to sit at the desk to write up blood forms everyday because I'm in the mood to hurt patients the next day with needles, and then torture myself afterwards with having stacks of results to chase, sign and report isit? I have no problem with not wanting bloods done and I can keep phlebs happy by not having any single job for them, but when my Consultants come after me and start getting upset abt why I'm not monitoring blood results for my patients, are the phlebs gonna come to my rescue and say they're so sorry for me being scolded just because I was trying to keep them happy by lessening their workload? NO!!!! OBVIOUSLY NOT! They're probably turn around and say "She didn't request, so obviously it's not done."

Honestly, sometimes, I find it quite difficult to keep my cool at people like the above. I'm seriously thinking that I can be such a nasty Consultant (if I become a Consultant one day that is....hahaha).

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Blogging after a long day's on call now.

My day's been UTTERLY SHIT! So many patients, and not very simple cases too. It was mad today, and honestly, I feel very very bad for not clerking many patients, but can't blame me since I have been so busy doing jobs in the other wards.

It did piss me off when I was asked to dose warfarins. Pissed because these things could be done before 5pm, but those lazy buggers just couldn't be bothered to do so and dare knock off on time (or even early!) without finishing their outstanding jobs. And I got fed up when I was asked to dose warfarins when INRs (a type of blood test to test the clotting status of the blood) weren't even done ever since the patient was started...high dose somemore. How freaking dangerous can that be? I can't believe that anyone can just ignore abt this! I got quite nasty by dosing the warfarin, but stating in the notes that I did it very reluctantly and am not pleased to be asked to dose the warfarin when there is no INR done. Thinking back, perhaps, I shouldn;t even go and dose it and ask that team to do it themselves tomorrow or solve their own INR problem. Hate it when people dunno what to do, and take the opportunity that it's past 5, and then throw the dirt to others. So fucking irresponsible!!!!! PUI!

Then I also got a stupid request to review a patient, which obviously I didn't, and asked the night team to go do so since it was already 10pm, and I've still got other jobs to do when I'm supposed to knock off at 9pm. Apparently, the nurses bleeped me to ask for a review because the patient is lying on the floor half naked, and refusing to get up and they don't know what to do and is feeling pissed abt it. Would u, as a busy doc, get fed up over such lame requests? I mean, hello...what am I supposed to do? Go there, and say "AY SIR! Can u just stop throwing trantrums and stop all your nonsense by getting up? I don't have time to entertain people like u manz!"?!?!?!?!

Then u get called to do venflons on whiny patients. And then get asked by the husband if I know what the venflon is for. I only know that she needs antiemetics which goes IV, and told him, then he came telling me that she's got a syringe driver for dunno what. Told him that all I know is that I'm asked to put in the venflon, and I'm only there to do that. Then he went on and say that hopefully we know what we're doing. WTF! Couldn't be bothered to talk more to him, finished my job and walked off. I can understand that the husband is upset that his wife is in hospital, but with the way he's treating her, it's no wonder why she's so whiny. Just a bit of pain, and she'll start shrieking and behaving like as if I did a lumbar puncture on her without anaesthetic. Note that she's already shrieking when I only just touched her, not even with a needle. And her husband got so shocked and worked up, asking me how come the wife's arm is so red....duh..of cos it'll be red lah...cos I tied a torniquet round her arm what! I know I sound mean for saying this, but if patients think they're really ill enough to want medical attention, then bloody tolerate with whatever that needs to be done in hospital. If u're so dead unwillingly to have anything done, or see no point in being in hospital, or just want to be Queen Shiba, then jolly well fuck off and don't get yourself admitted in the first place. The hospital staff are busy enough, and I don't think any of them fancy having these irritating people around to make their life more difficult than it already is.

At certain times, I have this mad thought that patients should be charged each time they request for a doctor's attention for nonsensical reasons.

And seriously, a lot of these irritating patients just need a baby sitter with them 24/7 just to entertain them. They don't really need anything else (even though they're ill) except to be entertained.

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Thanks to stupid ppl like the above, I didn't even have time to have dinner, and am now slurping my instant noodles. Can't believe that I actually came home at 11pm, cos my senior didn't do any of the ward jobs despite not being on call, and expecting me to do them. TMD!

If only Dearie is here..sigh. I do need some TLC now. And if only he's here, I'm sure he'll be more than happy to cook me a nice bowl of noodles with ingredients, and I'll be able to make him listen to all my complaints for the day...hahaha.

Sheesh..it's on days like this when I ask myself why on earth I make myself do Medicine to get myself into all this shit, when I could have jolly well done an easier course and be happy with a 9-5 job, and then I won't have a problem with having to find a job in China, but happily marry Dearie and live the rest of my life as a taitai.

Argh! Gonna call Dearie now. Hope he's awake. I desperately need to hear his voice to let myself sleep well later...lol...