Hmm..didn't know I was that positive...
My buddy came knocking on the door, dying to pour out her sorrows about work. Honestly, it's the first time I feel support going on amongst us junior doctors. I never thought support exists, and it's only normal for one to keep problems to oneself and solve it, rather than whine abt it, wanting a listening ear.
It was today I realise that I've changed my thoughts so much, and never did I think that this change in me could have such a great impact on my buddy. And I put a lot of it down to being left to be independent abroad, and the depressive episode years ago.
I can recall how it felt back then. I hated myself a lot for being diagnosed with this. I hated the pills I had to take, because it makes me feel that I must be so abnormal that I needed it. I hated seeing the doctor on a regular basis.
But I have got out of that phase, and I do not feel the need to hide abt it like how I did before. I didn't feel shy abt falling ill, and have been constantly reminding to stay positive. I am determined to prevent a relapse.
It was a struggle initially, and I didn't realise that it has become a part of me now. My mentality has changed drastically. I am taking things easier now, and have learnt to adapt to situations and not putting tooooooo much thoughts into issues which aren't going to change.
"If u think the situation is abnormal, then try to make it normal. But if the others around u aren't even interested in making it normal, then try to persuade them. However, if it doesn't work, then forget abt it. Just make it as normal as you can for yourself. Make the best out of the worst situation." I told my pal today.
"How do u manage to take things so calmly?" she asked.
"What do u gain by being uptight abt it? What do u gain by insisting that things should be the way u want it? There's a lot of things in this world which will upset u, and if u keep getting frustrated abt every single issue, it doesn't benefit u. Might as well throw it aside if it's not a life-and-death thing" I said.
"Then how do u manage if u said something which might be offensive?" she asked.
"Apologise to that person. But if he/she hates u even after u said sorry and won't forgive u, then heck it, unless he/she is someone extremely impt to u" I said.
Gosh, I can't believe all that came from me.
It was today I realise that I've changed my thoughts so much, and never did I think that this change in me could have such a great impact on my buddy. And I put a lot of it down to being left to be independent abroad, and the depressive episode years ago.
I can recall how it felt back then. I hated myself a lot for being diagnosed with this. I hated the pills I had to take, because it makes me feel that I must be so abnormal that I needed it. I hated seeing the doctor on a regular basis.
But I have got out of that phase, and I do not feel the need to hide abt it like how I did before. I didn't feel shy abt falling ill, and have been constantly reminding to stay positive. I am determined to prevent a relapse.
It was a struggle initially, and I didn't realise that it has become a part of me now. My mentality has changed drastically. I am taking things easier now, and have learnt to adapt to situations and not putting tooooooo much thoughts into issues which aren't going to change.
"If u think the situation is abnormal, then try to make it normal. But if the others around u aren't even interested in making it normal, then try to persuade them. However, if it doesn't work, then forget abt it. Just make it as normal as you can for yourself. Make the best out of the worst situation." I told my pal today.
"How do u manage to take things so calmly?" she asked.
"What do u gain by being uptight abt it? What do u gain by insisting that things should be the way u want it? There's a lot of things in this world which will upset u, and if u keep getting frustrated abt every single issue, it doesn't benefit u. Might as well throw it aside if it's not a life-and-death thing" I said.
"Then how do u manage if u said something which might be offensive?" she asked.
"Apologise to that person. But if he/she hates u even after u said sorry and won't forgive u, then heck it, unless he/she is someone extremely impt to u" I said.
Gosh, I can't believe all that came from me.
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