Missing Jason..

Didn't do much today. It's another relaxing day for me. It will be my last day of relaxation as I'll be starting revision again tomorrow.

My room's been very warm today. There hasn't been much breeze. Being intolerant to heat, I had to rely on my humidifier and fan to cool my room down. I hope it doesn't get warmer...can't imagine manz. Maybe drinking more water will help..

Basically just chatting with Jason via MSN and webcamming with him this afternoon. I was so happy to see him again. He's ill and went to see the doctor. Just a throat infection. Poor boy, he hasn't been feeling well for some time. Hope he gets well soon.

I spent a lot of time looking at him. Each time he laughs or smiles, it makes me smile as well. I can't describe how pleased I am. Knowing that he's ill, I reckon he must be feeling uncomfortable and weak, so I tried to make him laugh by imitating his silly patterns. I was so glad it cheered him up.

There were several times I kept looking at him while he was doing his work in front of the comp. I was trying hard to remember how he looked when he's putting his heart and soul into his work. When seeing this, I pitied him and at the same time, I felt so proud of him. My bf..a responsible, dedicated and diligent army officer. It isn't his position in the army which made me feel. It's the qualities he possess.

I have met many guys in my life, but what makes Jason different from the vast majority is his working attitude. How many guys would insist on not clearing leave because of a job which hasn't been completed? How many would bring their work home to do after office hours? How many actually take NS seriously? What the majority isn't able to do or rather won't do is what Jason will do. Each time I recall this, it will make me smile again.

Despite this, I still feel a sense of pity for him. He seems to have piling work to do everyday and don't rest much, yet at the end of the day, have to spend time with me in effort not to let me feel left alone. All I could is to watch him do his work. I can't even help him lighten his load. I wish I could do any slightest thing for him, but being so far away, I can't even sit beside him to accompany him..can't make him a drink..can't give him a little hug, providing him with a bit of comfort. I tried my best to be there for him, but still, I am not convinced that that is the best I can do. I hope I can find a way to make him feel me closer to him.

It's almost 6am in sg now. Jason should still be sleeping, but will be waking up soon and getting ready to start the day's work again. Not sure if he slept well..hopefully he did, so that he will be fresh later. He's got a presentation later, and I'm silently wishing him all the best for it. I hope he will do well and earn praises from his boss again.

Just finish downloading the song he wanted - First of May by the Bee Gees. I am feeling excited about sending it to him later..heez..hope it will put a smile on him again. He looks really handsome when he smiles.. :)

I love you Jason...miss u...