New phase of my life

Having graduated from Uni and starting my first official job makes me feel old. Making prayers in the temple this time was different from my usual prayers of asking for blessings to pass my exams.

I'm leaving for the UK tonight again, and believe it or not, I have cried thrice secretly today already. In fact, I was starting to feel pretty emotional since last night.

I guess I'm feeling pretty bad this time because I haven't got anything to look forward much to in the UK. Dearie isn't there anymore, and basically, I'm gonna be all alone again...back to the days which I dread so much. I...really..don't want to go back...not if Dearie isn't there...

He told me before he left for China and last night that he'll go back to UK and look for me. He told me he'll be there in October, and I'll just have to tolerate 2 months there without him. He said he won't leave me alone. I know he'll try, but I don't know if he will definitely be back. It seems as though believing in it is the only way to keep me going. I can't imagine not seeing him for an entire year, and having to face so much difficulties chatting with him too. Hvaing him around is sooo important to me.

I'll miss my family..and I'm not sure when I'll be home to see them again. Despite the quarrels I have with them, I know that deep down, I still love them dearly.