Ophthalmology in Swansea

The entry I blogged in Swansea:
"11th September

Here I am in my bedroom in Swansea, typing this without an internet connection.

I was allocated a twin room, and I have the whole room to myself. Sounds damn good cos it's really big, with 2 beds (not as if I need another bed lah), 2 study tables, and a sink. But for some strange reason, I feel very lonely in this room. Perhaps...I'm more comfortable being in a room for one person. Then again, we're not allowed to swop rooms.

Swansea's different from Cardiff. It's a cleaner, quieter and friendlier place. At least so far, I haven't met anyone really nasty yet, and I hope I won't get to meet any too.

I had a busy and tiring day. The wheel of my cabin luggage is spoilt, and hence, it was a nightmare dragging the heavy bag to my accomodation here. Fortunately I've got Daniel to help me with it, while I dragged his.

I should be grateful for having Daniel with me in Swansea for the next few weeks since I don't know anyone else here. We're doing different specialties for the 1st block, but at least..I know I won't be all alone here..at least..I'll have someone eat dinner with me, go out with me, watch VCDs with me, and go to the supermarket with me. We went to Swansea tgt this afternoon, and went food shopping in the city after that. And I'm so pleased when we both agreed to have dinner tgt every night in Swansea if possible. He'll do the cooking, while I'll just help with whatever is needed e.g. washing. I won't have to have takeaway meals every night now that he has brought his pots n pans over. I really miss Chinese food (I had Italian food for almost the whole week already), and I was so darn excited when he said he's cooking chicken rice just now.

It's strange. I actually mentioned that "I'll have someone eat dinner with me, go out with me, watch VCDs with me...". I don't wanna be alone for a reason I don't understand. Perhaps..I'm sick and tired of it at the moment. Maybe I just want friends to distract me from being homesick, and to help me love this place.

I miss my friends and family in Singapore too *weeps*. I feel like calling home to just hear my parent's voice, but I haven't got a calling card with me. I know I can just use my auto-roaming phone, but I have no idea what's holding me back. And the fact that I haven't got the internet sorted here (I hope this building allows wireless access) makes me feel more isolated from home. I love being online. I love having my MSN on. I don't have to talk to anyone, but whenever I scroll down the list and see my friends being online, there's an indescribable joy within.

I'm struggling..struggling to overcome this all by myself. I can't keep weeping for the next few mths. I still got a long way to go, and even though it's difficult, I must try to make it to the end. I must..I must. I'm praying hard that I'll be given the strength to carry on. "

The entire week doing Ophth (eyes) was fruitful and very interesting. I learn new things everyday, and the timetable is so organised and well planned. The consultants and their team are so nice to us, not making us feel unwanted. I went to Swansea only knowing Daniel, but at the end of the week, I have made new friends in my course like Oliver, Beth, Katherine, Pinelopi, Richard etc.

There are actually 2 clans in the group that are having attachment in Swansea with me, namely the ONz and NOT ONz. I think I belong more to the latter..lol.

Pinelopi is my partner for my entire attachment in Swansea. She's Greek (I seem to click with Greeks manz..). She's not the chionging sort, and very very decent. I like her very much, and I had a great time with her during attachment. She, being an international student like me, misses home too, and we both agree that we miss home more and more the longer we study in UK. She misses home so badly that sometimes, she'll just spend 400 quid just to fly back to Greece for a weekend...haha. I learnt so much about Greece throughout the past few days. She was really curious about Singapore too, so whenever we've got time, we'll start telling each other abt our own country. She's only 20 this yr. It's unbelievable that she started Grade 1 at 5, and entering uni at 17!

Richard's another very nice guy, the non-chionging sort too. Hmm..I find it easier to get along with the non-chionging sort (except Sophie..lol)...and they're usually the ones who are more willing to mix with foreign students I suppose. Got to know him thru Dan :) He's got this decent and blur look..haha..very cute.

Then again, I had to try to strike a balance by trying to know or at least smile at the chionging gang. I guess..it was chinese cooking by dan and me which got them interested to come talk to us. You can see a few of them crowding ard us to see what we're cooking, and feeling damn excited when we told them we have more than enough for them to try. Dan clicks more with them, while I tend to be quieter, but hey, I'm feeling pleased enough that at least they know I exist, and some of them do smile and say Hi to me when they see me ard. It was even more shocking when they asked if I wanted to join them to walk along the coast to grab a bite, and clubbing on another occasion. I went for the walk along the coast and to the pub with them one night. The view along the coast was beautiful. And the pub was having a KTV session that night. The older folks were having a great time singing, while we just sat down and chat. It surprised the angmos and Dan that I can't drink, and as expected, they made me try drinks. Dan made me try his red bull mixed with vodka, while Katherine got me to try something else which I can't remember. I think I prefer the red bull since it's sweet..but still, I don't like the taste of alcohol.

It was fun hanging around Dan when he cooks dinner every night. Hence, I'm always looking forward to be back in the hall asap to have dinner, and always excited when I think about what Dan is gonna cook for the night. I'm so well fed there. He puts in so much effort for dinner, and I'm always hopping around happily waiting for food to be served. He cooks pretty well. Isn't that impressive? You don't get many Chinese guys who can cook, or bother to cook. And he was so kind to look high and low for me when he realised I wasn't ard to go to the kitchen with him last night. Thinking that I was probably stuck in hospital, he kindly kept some food for me to warm up when I come back! I can't believe someone is actually doing that for me! I was smiling so much when I saw the chicken in the fridge even though I didn't eat it. *touched*

Academic wise, I have to cope with long hours in placement, and lots of reading in the evening. I'm practically rushing for time every night, but am pretty pleased that I kinda know my stuffs. Didn't feel stupid when I was asked questions. And I found reading beforehand so useful. I don't feel so lost in clinic that much, and I was able to understand things much quicker when the doctors are talking to me. Also, was kinda pressed for time to do ppt slides since I've gotto give a presentation to my coursemates and consultants every week.

There's this very cute model of a pair of eyes in the outpatient's clinic. It was a fantastic learning tool for us when we're trying to practise our skills using the ophthalmoscope. There are 7 words in the eye which we have to find, and according to my consultant, he said most students only find 3 and he was very impressed when I told him I found them all. Yup, I did feel proud of myself..hehe.

I saw cataract surgeries in theatre too. It was absolutely amazing. The consultant got me to watch him do the job through a scope, and I was so fascinated by how cataracts are removed and replaced by an intraocular lens. The new lens is just like soft contact lenses! I also managed to get the chance to see a case of dislocated lens in surgery. This patient had Marfan's Syndrome, which gave him really long fingers and limbs. You don't get to see such patients very much, and it was a great eye opener for me.

I also attended minor eye operation sessions, whereby I witness Mr Khan (surgeons of wateva specialty are titled Mr rather than Dr) remove skin cancers around the eye, or to fix eyelids which are either flipped inwards or outwards. He gave me the opportunity to assist him too! Although I was only asked to hold lids and cut stitches, I was more than delighted. It's only then I have the chance to go really close to watch. He also taught me many things like to put an eye patch, and how to rectify problems given by the patients which require surgery. It wasn't a blind watching session at all.

Laser surgery was an insight which wasn't that interesting. I got to watch that in Mr Roberts' clinic too. It was like playing with a computer game whereby you zap stuffs in some space-like background.

Oh yes..after believing that sitting real close to the TV can make me short-sighted for the past 23 years, I finally found that this is total rubbish. Mr Roberts said the length from the front to the back of the human eye is about the same in everyone. But if your length is shorter since birth, you can't escape from being long-sighted, and if it's longer since birth, you can't escape from being short-sighted. It's only just when you'll find it obvious in your sight.

I managed to see a slit-lamp, which is a bulky machine which eye specialists use to look into the eye. It's much more accurate than using an ophthalmoscope (eye specialists think ophthalmoscopes are crap..haha). And with guidance from the doctors, I was able to very very clearly see abnormalities in the eyes, which could easily be missed using the ophthalmoscope. And using the slit-lamp, we can also check the pressure within the eye to see if it's raised.

I attended clinics whereby I got to talk to patients, watch their consultations, and also to examine them. Mr Roberts was just talking to me about the third nerve damage, and so coincidentally, a patient with ALL the classical signs was in for a consultation the next minute. I have seen these before, but was still very pleased to be talked abt these again. Serves as a form of revision. There are bits during clinic which I forgot and couldn't answer when Mr Roberts asked. Felt pretty bad during then, and was telling Mr Roberts that I can't imagine being in 4th yr when my knowledge is little. He told me that at some point, I'll get there, and I shouldn't worry about it. They all went through this stage before. Well, I hope what he said is true.

Mr Khan asked if I am considering to do Ophthalmology in future. Gave it a thought, and to be honest, I am pretty interested in this field. However, the competition for this field is extremely great both in UK and Sg, which is making me think twice about it. Then again, let's leave it all to destiny. I'm sure a path will be there for me to walk on when the time comes. :)

Today, I saw a teenage boy which I don't think I'll ever forget. I felt a strong sense of pity for this child, and I'm sure it must be miserable living for him. He has skin which is red and peeling throughout his face, body and limbs. The red was similar to the colour of beef and his skin was extremely thin that you feel that it'll just break and bleed if u just touch him. I'm not exaggerating. It's true. He suffering from extremely severe eczema, and has been any kind of treatment one can think of, but nothing is making him better. He's very isolated from the others, very depressed, very quiet, and self-conscious as well. He's 17, but because of his condition, it has affected his growth, making him look like a 10 yr old instead. I felt helpless as well because I am in no position to try to help him. The dermatologists have tried their best, but even they can't do anything abt it, needless to say me. I am imagining the smile of his face if he can ever get well, and seeing himself protected by a layer of normal skin on the mirror. And I sincerely hope that one day, there will be a new treatment which will allow him to feel better.

It's a long way past my slping hr. I feel damn bad going to bed this late tonight..grr. Moving house later somemore..sianz manz! Wonder how I'm gonna struggle with this plus having to do reading up this weekend before Haematology (blood) attachment next week. A whole new block of attachment, a whole new reading list for the entire week. I shall push on. Shall make sure I make my Saturday productive, rather than being a slacky mood like tonight. Piangz...only studied one topic today..how shitty can I get manz?! Bah!